It is not very often that Susan and I have an experience that leaves us breathless. But this past Friday that is exactly what happened. We were surprised, charmed, grateful and overwhelmed by the wedding of Zino and Otiti.
Many years ago we hosted homestay students and had people from all over the world stay with us. One young man that came to stay with us was Moses. At least that is what he told us to call him. I believe he was from Nigeria.
Moses stayed with us for several months and then went on to find his own apartament. However, Moses stayed in touch with us. He came back for lunch several times, once with a friend and once with his father. And then one day we invited him for dinner with his girlfriend whom we had not met. To be honest I cannot recall how long ago that was but maybe a year or two. That is when we first met Zino.
And then, in May, I received an E-mail inviting Susan and I to a wedding. This is when I saw that Moses was also called Otiti, or Titi for short. The wedding was to be on the 30th of June at the Mirage Banquet Hall in Surrey. The invitation said “Traditional Wedding” and we were not sure what that meant however it sounded wonderful. This was to be our introduction to African culture and we looked forward to it.
These are pictures of Zino and Otiti taken from the web site they created for their wedding.
In anticipation of the wedding I decided I did not want to be distracted by my camera(s) and I left them all at home. Mistake! It was the wrong decision but I was stuck. I did have my cell phone with me. It is an older model and the camera is not the best, but, as they say, the best camera is always the one you have with you.
We arrived at the Mirage at the appointed time and walked up the stairs to the hall and we were immediately swept up into the celebration.
I took this picture while we were sitting with the families. They were sitting together exchanging gifts and discussing the marriage. Moses is sitting on the left end with his father next to him and his mother beside him.
As we entered the hall we were immediately approached by one of the groomsmen who welcomed us and explained that the families were involved in a somewhat formal ritual of presenting presents and discussing the marriage. They were all seated and other guests were standing back either watching or waiting elsewhere in the hall. We were unable to understand exactly what was happening as the language was new to us.
When Otiti’s father saw us he signaled that we were to be given chairs with the family and we sat down while this ritual went on. The bride’s mother seemed to be in charge and she said she would switch to English just for us. It was a real honour that they gave us. She also announced to the family members who did not know us who we were.
Part of the proceedings that I enjoyed was when various single girls were brought before Otiti and he was asked, “Is this the one you want?” Of course he said “no” and they continued until at last Zino was brought before him and he chose her. But then she feigned uncertainty and money was thrown at her feet a bill at a time to demonstrate how he would be able to look after her. It was very touching. When the floor was covered in dollar bills she finally gave in and consented.
The lady on the right with the microphone I believe is the bride’s mother. She seemed to be the Master of Ceremonies for the family gathering. In the center Zino is sitting on Otiti’s knee after agreeing to accept his proposal.
Because of the langauge barrier and my poor memory and hearing I am not certain of who is who so forgive me if I get some of this wrong.
After the families met the celebration got under way. The hall was divided down the middle with two rows of tables facing each other with an isle in the middle. In one corner there was a band and the music was loud and constant. And it never varied. It was sort of a merengue beat but with heavy drums. Later on we were able to dance to it and it was very enjoyable.
The grooms family was introduced and they made their way way down the isle dancing every step of the way. When they reached the dance floor they continued their
The Mirage Banquet Hall is an exceptional venue. Entrance is the bright area to the left of enter. Bar is at the left, Stage at the right.
dance for several minutes. Then the Bride’s family followed in similar fashion. Then it was the turn of the Groom and the Groomsmen and finally the Bride and the bridesmaids came down the isle. It was a beautiful display and there was a sense of true joy in the room!
The Bride’s family dancing down the isle towards the dance floor.
The Bridesmaids dancing down the isle announcing the arrival of the Bride.
Moses dancing with his Groomsmen on the dancefloor.
Here, on the left, Moses greets his Bride as she dances down the isle and on the left right Moses dances with Zino. During the wedding Zino wore htree different outfits all of them richly decorated and extremely beautiful.
Dinner was buffet style. We were placed with two other white couples but we were honoured when we were asked to go up to the buffet with the families of the Bride and Groom. The music did not abate during the meal and the dancing was continuous. After dinner Susan and I managed to dance for a while and really enjoyed ourselves.
By 10:00 pm the party was showing no signs of slowing down but we defintely were. It was a long drive home so we left at that point having had a wonderful time. We had hesitated about going to this wedding but, as it turned out, we were very glad we did. It was a wonderful experience.
Otiti and Zino cutting the cake. I suspect this a “western” addition to the ceremony.
Much of the ceremonies we did not understand but they made for great photos.
I think this was pure photo opportunity but it was lovely. The whole ceremony and reception had a feeling of happiness and joy that I have never experienced at a wedding before.
A “selfie” with dancing going on behind us.
Us with the Bride and Groom
In the entrance to the hall there were several very large pictures of Otiti and Zino taken for the wedding. We are standing by one of them.
Our last picture is Susan and I with Otiti’s parents standing between us. They could not have made us more welcome. They made us feel like family!
The “Marr Family Pictures” is created by me, Flynn Marr, and is a private photo album of the Marr family and it’s offshoots.
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